They started a new program at work, where we can work 4 ten-hour days. Unfortunately, I can't do that, because they say you have to start early, not work late, and I have to be home to get ds off to school. However, my company was flexible, and offered to let me work shorter lunch hours so that I could leave early one day. A very nice compromise.
Yesterday was my early day this week. And wonderful timing it was! Ds had a very bad day at daycare on Monday, so having me get off early on Tuesday was a real blessing. He was only in daycare for minutes, before I arrived to surprise him.
And what did I have planned for my little apple fanatic? Why, the apple orchard, of course!
We ran up to a local apple orchard that had sadly been devastated by a tornado last year. The twister had knocked out most of the buildings, but spared the majority of the apple trees. They did a massive cleanup and restoration on the place, and re-opened in record time this month. I was delighted to hear it, as the loss of that orchard seemed like a terrible blow to this area. It's just one of those rare places that you can go to with the kids, and everyone has a good time. A place that becomes a tradition. Thank goodness the tornado didn't take that away from this town.
Ds had a good time. He kept insisting on going Downstairs. I'm not even sure he knew what was down there, but he wanted to go, so we went. Well, downstairs was a small restaurant that specialized in (what else?) apple pie.
Strangely, my son (who could easily eat a half dozen apples in a day if we'd permit it) does not like apple pie! I knew this going in, so I let him pick whatever he wanted to order, then I got the pie with the intention of letting him try the first bite. I'm not sure what it is. Perhaps it's the fact that the pie was hot (well, just kind of warm, but he won't eat anything warmer than room temperature). Or maybe it's the fact that it's cooked at all. Or maybe the combination of sugar and spice isn't balanced to his liking? Ya got me. But he gave the pie a six on a scale of one to ten. Not a good score from my apple connoisseur. I, on the other hand, thought the pie was yummy, and thoroughly enjoyed it. Ds was completely content with his ice cream.
His favorite part was the ability to taste test all the apples. He was in apple heaven! He went in with a Macintosh bias, and the taste testing didn't sway that. But he did find several types that were running close seconds, thirds and fourths.
Letting my son loose in an apple orchard is akin to letting the average child loose in a candy store. (Any parent should be so lucky, huh? :) And he doesn't like pop, either. Sensory issues can have their up side!)
We left with an armload of apples, donuts, apple butter and fudge. (My wallet is still whimpering.) Then we had to make a pit stop at Grandma and Grandpa's on the way home and share out booty with them.
It was just a nice time. It felt wonderful to spend some good one-on-one time with my son. It's been a long while since we've had the opportunity. Now I'll get more chances, with this new work schedule.
He's already hinting at the pumpkin patch. Hm, maybe a little closer to Halloween...
Wednesday, September 24, 2008
Saturday, September 20, 2008
Validation
We just came from the autism specialist. That made me feel a lot better. He pointed out how well ds is doing in some environments, versus how badly he's doing in other environments. At that point, no medication, no therapy, no discipline is going to vastly improve how he does at the bad environments. You need to provide supports there to help him function better.
So we didn't really change much of what we're doing. A slight tweak to the meds, based more on his huge change in height and weight than anything else, and a recommendation for a place to go for an advocate.
Dh and I were just talking. We keep hearing the same things from all the doctors, not just this one. Our son does well when treated a certain way, with a lot of patience, with a slower pace, with RESPECT (that was a new revelation), and with consideration for the sensory issues he faces.
The school and daycare treat ds like he's a behavior problem, and that he needs to be punished. That's not working. So while they keep turning to us and insisting that we "do something!," the real problem is that THEY aren't doing anything to accommodate his needs. They treat him as if he were NT, and he's not. They punish him, which doesn't help. They promise supports that they aren't following through with. They don't acknowledge that he needs to proceed at a different pace, that his sensory issues exist and need to be respected, and that if they insist that it's their way or the highway, then he won't succeed in that environment.
So we didn't get any instant fixes from the doctor, though we didn't expect to. But we did get assurances that we're doing the right things for him, and validation that the school and the daycare are not.
WILL the school provide the appropriate support? I stopped hoping for that a long time ago. Will the daycare? They haven't yet, but I haven't completely given up there. The last time we had a serious problem there, ds was suspended, and he was threatened with expulsion, and we pulled him out before he was completely thrown out. But that was before ds was diagnosed with autism. So we'll see if the autism diagnosis changes anything. They have therapeutic services at the daycare, though we've never seen any services provided. We've been told that they have been given special training in autism, though we've seen little evidence of that either. I guess this could go either way at the meeting with the daycare. They'll either threaten to throw him out (or just do so), or they'll offer support. We'll see how it goes.
The doc couldn't really support us medically. But he could support us emotionally, and that really does help. I'm feeling better, and feeling a little more confident about facing the school and the daycare staff. If it blows up in my face, so be it. I guess it wasn't meant to be.
So we didn't really change much of what we're doing. A slight tweak to the meds, based more on his huge change in height and weight than anything else, and a recommendation for a place to go for an advocate.
Dh and I were just talking. We keep hearing the same things from all the doctors, not just this one. Our son does well when treated a certain way, with a lot of patience, with a slower pace, with RESPECT (that was a new revelation), and with consideration for the sensory issues he faces.
The school and daycare treat ds like he's a behavior problem, and that he needs to be punished. That's not working. So while they keep turning to us and insisting that we "do something!," the real problem is that THEY aren't doing anything to accommodate his needs. They treat him as if he were NT, and he's not. They punish him, which doesn't help. They promise supports that they aren't following through with. They don't acknowledge that he needs to proceed at a different pace, that his sensory issues exist and need to be respected, and that if they insist that it's their way or the highway, then he won't succeed in that environment.
So we didn't get any instant fixes from the doctor, though we didn't expect to. But we did get assurances that we're doing the right things for him, and validation that the school and the daycare are not.
WILL the school provide the appropriate support? I stopped hoping for that a long time ago. Will the daycare? They haven't yet, but I haven't completely given up there. The last time we had a serious problem there, ds was suspended, and he was threatened with expulsion, and we pulled him out before he was completely thrown out. But that was before ds was diagnosed with autism. So we'll see if the autism diagnosis changes anything. They have therapeutic services at the daycare, though we've never seen any services provided. We've been told that they have been given special training in autism, though we've seen little evidence of that either. I guess this could go either way at the meeting with the daycare. They'll either threaten to throw him out (or just do so), or they'll offer support. We'll see how it goes.
The doc couldn't really support us medically. But he could support us emotionally, and that really does help. I'm feeling better, and feeling a little more confident about facing the school and the daycare staff. If it blows up in my face, so be it. I guess it wasn't meant to be.
Friday, September 19, 2008
Daycare Woes
The daycare called me at work today. They were not happy. Ds had gotten upset, and he threw a ball at a staff member, hitting her in the eye.
Now they want to call a meeting with one of the caregivers, the caregiver's boss, and us. Oh goody.
So now along with the school calling an iep meeting right after he took off running during a fire drill, and with the daycare calling a meeting after he threw a ball at someone's face, I guess you could say it's all sort of falling apart.
I'm pretty much at an all time low. I don't know how to help my son. I don't know how to just plain live anymore. It seems like everything is SO hard! It shouldn't be this difficult. It just shouldn't.
I don't see how to improve this situation. My son isn't like that at home, so I don't know how to fix what's wrong at school and daycare. I'm at a complete loss. My son would never hit someone with a ball, not at home. Why does it happen there? How do I have any influence on something that's happening out of my element? They want me to put an end to this behavior, but I never deal with this behavior! So what do I do?
Great time for the behavior therapy to be yanked away, huh?
I do have an appointment with the autism specialist tomorrow. Perhaps that will help.
I think I need sleep. A lot of it. Things will look better after a good night's sleep.
Now they want to call a meeting with one of the caregivers, the caregiver's boss, and us. Oh goody.
So now along with the school calling an iep meeting right after he took off running during a fire drill, and with the daycare calling a meeting after he threw a ball at someone's face, I guess you could say it's all sort of falling apart.
I'm pretty much at an all time low. I don't know how to help my son. I don't know how to just plain live anymore. It seems like everything is SO hard! It shouldn't be this difficult. It just shouldn't.
I don't see how to improve this situation. My son isn't like that at home, so I don't know how to fix what's wrong at school and daycare. I'm at a complete loss. My son would never hit someone with a ball, not at home. Why does it happen there? How do I have any influence on something that's happening out of my element? They want me to put an end to this behavior, but I never deal with this behavior! So what do I do?
Great time for the behavior therapy to be yanked away, huh?
I do have an appointment with the autism specialist tomorrow. Perhaps that will help.
I think I need sleep. A lot of it. Things will look better after a good night's sleep.
Wednesday, September 17, 2008
She'll Multiply
Quote for the day:
'Whatever you give a woman, she's going to multiply. If you give her sperm, she'll give you a baby.
If you give her a house, she'll give you a home.
If you give her groceries, she'll give you a meal.
If you give her a smile, she'll give you her heart.
She multiplies and enlarges what is given to her."
So - if you give her crap, you will receive a bucket full of shit.
Love and appreciate all the women in your life.
(Thanks to Cathi for this one.)
'Whatever you give a woman, she's going to multiply. If you give her sperm, she'll give you a baby.
If you give her a house, she'll give you a home.
If you give her groceries, she'll give you a meal.
If you give her a smile, she'll give you her heart.
She multiplies and enlarges what is given to her."
So - if you give her crap, you will receive a bucket full of shit.
Love and appreciate all the women in your life.
(Thanks to Cathi for this one.)
Tuesday, September 16, 2008
Heartsick
Tonight was the school's open house. It only lasts an hour (from 6-7), so dh and I figured we'd both go and meet the teacher formally, and see what the classroom environment would be like.
We got there right about 6, when they said it would start, but discovered that the teacher's presentation wasn't until 6:40, and there was nothing going on between 6 and 6:40. So we wandered around the school, and went out for dh to have a smoke or two.
In strolling through the building, we did cross paths with his teacher. I had met her once briefly, as had dh at a different time. She didn't really acknowledge us. I would have thought she'd come up and say, "Hi, I'm Mrs. So-and-so, and I'll be your child's teacher," or "Hi, I remember you from registration. I'm really looking forward to a good year," or something to that effect. When it didn't happen, when nothing happend, I was starting to feel out of place. It's not that we were being singled out or anything. She didn't greet any of the parents that way. The whole event seemed poorly planned. Or maybe poorly communicated. Perhaps that's more accurate. Looking back at it, I guess we were only supposed to show up for the 20 minutes that our teacher gave her presentation, not the whole hour. Oh well. Not a big deal. We just killed the 40 minutes hanging out. I chatted a little bit with another mom that I hadn't seen in a while, so that was nice. I don't get to chat with other school moms.
During the teacher's presentation, she handed out a flyer that talks about the grading percentages and such. It also talked about The Field Trip.
I'd heard about The Field Trip previously. I capitalize that deliberately. This isn't a plain old field trip to the local museum or zoo. This is a major Field Trip. It's for all the kids of his grade level at the school. They go to this facility at the forest preserve, and they stay there for three days and two nights. It's the buzz at the school, and all the kids are excited as all get out, even though it's not scheduled until the end of the year. This isn't simply a field trip. It's a right of passage.
There are rules for going. You can't be in any major trouble. (Hm, can you say meltdown?) And you have to participate in the class fundraising projects. (Yes, my boy, you lack social skills yet you must sell something or greet parents at a function.) They keep track of who participates in raising money and who doesn't. And there are many fundraising projects. There have already been two opportunities, and they've only been in school for three weeks. If you don't participate in fundraising, you either don't go, or you pay the full rate to go. They are trying to raise enough money so that all kids go at no charge.
Kids that couldn't attend The Field Trip could either stay home those three days, or they could go to school. However, they would not be permitted to hang out with the older grades at school. "That would be too much fun." They were going to be having a blast at The Field Trip, and those who couldn't go would NOT be permitted to have fun at school. They were to WORK. They would be assigned to the younger classrooms. This would not be fun for them. (Presumably, the ones staying behind would only be doing so if they had been naughty. Everyone else would, of course, attend.)
At the open house, there were lots of questions about the Field Trip. Dh and I had a lot of questions of our own. This was new territory. Ds away from home for 3 days without us? That would be a first. I raised my hand, and asked if they would be taking any parent chaperones. (She didn't know, but would let me know.) I'd hold off more specific questions until another, more private, discussion.
The presentation came to a close shortly after that, and dh and I were walking toward the door, but got separated in the crowd exiting. The teacher came up to me. She told me that she didn't think they wanted any parents to come on the trip. I smiled awkwardly, and admitted, "I didn't think you'd want to do this without me there." I told her I didn't know how they wanted to do this field trip - that's why I asked. (I guessed that they might be glad to have me along, that I could assure that things went smoothly with ds. It didn't sound like it was going to be welcome, from this conversation, though.)
That's when she told me that she didn't really know how all this would work either. She said that on this Field Trip, they were not equiped to deal with meltdowns. They couldn't have one of the adults stay with ds, for example, when they were on the hike. They'd have to keep going. There wouldn't be anyone that could be assigned to deal with him.
Oh, I see.
And she didn't know how all this would be organized. We'd talk. As the time got closer, we'd go over all this. She's not sure. She didn't know if they'd want me to go. She didn't know if an adult to watch him was possible. She'll have to ask. And maybe we wouldn't want him there. That would be fine. But they've never dealt with this before. I don't know how'd we work it out. After all, it will be a new situation for him, and new stuff is hard for him. But we'll talk.
Um, there's a problem with putting this discussion off. For one, I have a boy in that class who is hearing about this wonderful Field Trip, and how they will all love it, and "remember it for the rest of their lives." (I heard that phrase more than once tonight.) They will be working their butts off raising money between now and the end of the year, to assure their paid fee. They'd be on their best behavior, to "earn their right to attend." You can't have my son listening to all this every day, and then tell him, "Gee, sorry. Even if you have been good, and even if you did raise all the money we wanted you to, you still can't go, because...well... because you're different, and we just don't know how to deal with you, and we don't have any ability to make accomodations for you."
No way.
I'm just heartsick. What am I supposed to tell my son? I suppose the whole discussion is moot, because the likelyhood that he could behave well enough to "earn the right to attend" is pretty slim. Ds himself told me that "there's no second chances." He's heard that at school. Oh great.
I don't want him to get his hopes up for something that's not going to happen. I feel like he's being set up to fail. Not on purpose, but geez, let's be realistic here. They can't deal with his autism as it is. They already feel that "what he needs is discipline." That's bologna, but my point is that his meltdowns will be treated as misbehavior and a discipline issue, and he will probably not be allowed to attend anyway. I can just imagine that his first real meltdown will be punished with exclusion from The Field Trip.
How can he win? How can he go? What are the chances that he can go all year without a meltdown? At this point, he's going to know that if he gets upset, they'll tell him he can't go, and that will throw gasoline on an already volatile situation. If he thinks he's lost control, and will now be left out, he will explode. How can he not?
You've dangled this "trip of a lifetime" under his nose, and you'll yank it away if he can't maintain neurotypical behavior, and he's not neurotypical, and he can't maintain your concept of "good."
My son is not a bad kid. He is just trying to get along in an environment that is always hostile to his senses. He's trying to deal with an educational system that doesn't understand how his brain works. He's trying SO hard to be the good kid you want him to be, that he doesn't even know that he's already good.
He's not a bad kid. He's just struggling. And he needs some patience and understanding.
He wants to go on this trip, because everyone else made him want to go, and how can you do that to a boy that isn't going to be permitted to go? How can you break his heart like that? Can't you see how hard he tries? How can you look him in the eyes and tell him that even if he "earns the right to attend" by being melt-free, he still can't go because you can't accomodate him if the new situation of The Field Trip proves to be hard to cope with?
I wish I could pull him out of that school right now. They are really going to hurt him with this Field Trip, and it's just plain wrong. Why couldn't they have warned us about it before the school year began? Obviously this Field Trip is a HUGE part of the school experience for this grade. Why couldn't they have mentioned it to us, and asked if it could cause problems? Couldn't we figure out some way so that my son didn't get hurt by it?
Time to just bury my head in my pillow and have a good cry. Tomorrow I'll try to think of how to explain to my son how he's probably not going to get to go on that wonderful Field Trip. But not right now. My heart hurts too much to think right now.
We got there right about 6, when they said it would start, but discovered that the teacher's presentation wasn't until 6:40, and there was nothing going on between 6 and 6:40. So we wandered around the school, and went out for dh to have a smoke or two.
In strolling through the building, we did cross paths with his teacher. I had met her once briefly, as had dh at a different time. She didn't really acknowledge us. I would have thought she'd come up and say, "Hi, I'm Mrs. So-and-so, and I'll be your child's teacher," or "Hi, I remember you from registration. I'm really looking forward to a good year," or something to that effect. When it didn't happen, when nothing happend, I was starting to feel out of place. It's not that we were being singled out or anything. She didn't greet any of the parents that way. The whole event seemed poorly planned. Or maybe poorly communicated. Perhaps that's more accurate. Looking back at it, I guess we were only supposed to show up for the 20 minutes that our teacher gave her presentation, not the whole hour. Oh well. Not a big deal. We just killed the 40 minutes hanging out. I chatted a little bit with another mom that I hadn't seen in a while, so that was nice. I don't get to chat with other school moms.
During the teacher's presentation, she handed out a flyer that talks about the grading percentages and such. It also talked about The Field Trip.
I'd heard about The Field Trip previously. I capitalize that deliberately. This isn't a plain old field trip to the local museum or zoo. This is a major Field Trip. It's for all the kids of his grade level at the school. They go to this facility at the forest preserve, and they stay there for three days and two nights. It's the buzz at the school, and all the kids are excited as all get out, even though it's not scheduled until the end of the year. This isn't simply a field trip. It's a right of passage.
There are rules for going. You can't be in any major trouble. (Hm, can you say meltdown?) And you have to participate in the class fundraising projects. (Yes, my boy, you lack social skills yet you must sell something or greet parents at a function.) They keep track of who participates in raising money and who doesn't. And there are many fundraising projects. There have already been two opportunities, and they've only been in school for three weeks. If you don't participate in fundraising, you either don't go, or you pay the full rate to go. They are trying to raise enough money so that all kids go at no charge.
Kids that couldn't attend The Field Trip could either stay home those three days, or they could go to school. However, they would not be permitted to hang out with the older grades at school. "That would be too much fun." They were going to be having a blast at The Field Trip, and those who couldn't go would NOT be permitted to have fun at school. They were to WORK. They would be assigned to the younger classrooms. This would not be fun for them. (Presumably, the ones staying behind would only be doing so if they had been naughty. Everyone else would, of course, attend.)
At the open house, there were lots of questions about the Field Trip. Dh and I had a lot of questions of our own. This was new territory. Ds away from home for 3 days without us? That would be a first. I raised my hand, and asked if they would be taking any parent chaperones. (She didn't know, but would let me know.) I'd hold off more specific questions until another, more private, discussion.
The presentation came to a close shortly after that, and dh and I were walking toward the door, but got separated in the crowd exiting. The teacher came up to me. She told me that she didn't think they wanted any parents to come on the trip. I smiled awkwardly, and admitted, "I didn't think you'd want to do this without me there." I told her I didn't know how they wanted to do this field trip - that's why I asked. (I guessed that they might be glad to have me along, that I could assure that things went smoothly with ds. It didn't sound like it was going to be welcome, from this conversation, though.)
That's when she told me that she didn't really know how all this would work either. She said that on this Field Trip, they were not equiped to deal with meltdowns. They couldn't have one of the adults stay with ds, for example, when they were on the hike. They'd have to keep going. There wouldn't be anyone that could be assigned to deal with him.
Oh, I see.
And she didn't know how all this would be organized. We'd talk. As the time got closer, we'd go over all this. She's not sure. She didn't know if they'd want me to go. She didn't know if an adult to watch him was possible. She'll have to ask. And maybe we wouldn't want him there. That would be fine. But they've never dealt with this before. I don't know how'd we work it out. After all, it will be a new situation for him, and new stuff is hard for him. But we'll talk.
Um, there's a problem with putting this discussion off. For one, I have a boy in that class who is hearing about this wonderful Field Trip, and how they will all love it, and "remember it for the rest of their lives." (I heard that phrase more than once tonight.) They will be working their butts off raising money between now and the end of the year, to assure their paid fee. They'd be on their best behavior, to "earn their right to attend." You can't have my son listening to all this every day, and then tell him, "Gee, sorry. Even if you have been good, and even if you did raise all the money we wanted you to, you still can't go, because...well... because you're different, and we just don't know how to deal with you, and we don't have any ability to make accomodations for you."
No way.
I'm just heartsick. What am I supposed to tell my son? I suppose the whole discussion is moot, because the likelyhood that he could behave well enough to "earn the right to attend" is pretty slim. Ds himself told me that "there's no second chances." He's heard that at school. Oh great.
I don't want him to get his hopes up for something that's not going to happen. I feel like he's being set up to fail. Not on purpose, but geez, let's be realistic here. They can't deal with his autism as it is. They already feel that "what he needs is discipline." That's bologna, but my point is that his meltdowns will be treated as misbehavior and a discipline issue, and he will probably not be allowed to attend anyway. I can just imagine that his first real meltdown will be punished with exclusion from The Field Trip.
How can he win? How can he go? What are the chances that he can go all year without a meltdown? At this point, he's going to know that if he gets upset, they'll tell him he can't go, and that will throw gasoline on an already volatile situation. If he thinks he's lost control, and will now be left out, he will explode. How can he not?
You've dangled this "trip of a lifetime" under his nose, and you'll yank it away if he can't maintain neurotypical behavior, and he's not neurotypical, and he can't maintain your concept of "good."
My son is not a bad kid. He is just trying to get along in an environment that is always hostile to his senses. He's trying to deal with an educational system that doesn't understand how his brain works. He's trying SO hard to be the good kid you want him to be, that he doesn't even know that he's already good.
He's not a bad kid. He's just struggling. And he needs some patience and understanding.
He wants to go on this trip, because everyone else made him want to go, and how can you do that to a boy that isn't going to be permitted to go? How can you break his heart like that? Can't you see how hard he tries? How can you look him in the eyes and tell him that even if he "earns the right to attend" by being melt-free, he still can't go because you can't accomodate him if the new situation of The Field Trip proves to be hard to cope with?
I wish I could pull him out of that school right now. They are really going to hurt him with this Field Trip, and it's just plain wrong. Why couldn't they have warned us about it before the school year began? Obviously this Field Trip is a HUGE part of the school experience for this grade. Why couldn't they have mentioned it to us, and asked if it could cause problems? Couldn't we figure out some way so that my son didn't get hurt by it?
Time to just bury my head in my pillow and have a good cry. Tomorrow I'll try to think of how to explain to my son how he's probably not going to get to go on that wonderful Field Trip. But not right now. My heart hurts too much to think right now.
Sunday, September 14, 2008
3rd Week
At this time, dh and I are starting to wonder which will come first: will he get kicked out of school, or kicked out of daycare?
At daycare, we had two major problems. Ds was upset that he forgot something, so he just walked out of daycare. When the caregiver went after him, asking where he was going, ds yelled back, "Quit following me!" I hear he also tried to kick the caregiver when he tried to return him to the daycare. On another occasion, he was being hassled by another child, so he got upset, which ended up with him spitting (???) and hitting, followed by him running into the bathroom and holding the door closed so they couldn't get in. I'm wondering if I got the story right, because ds has never spit at anybody in his life. It may have been the other child, I don't know for sure. When they call me, it's so loud, and so much is going on, I don't always follow what is happening. And when the chaos clears, they just get off the phone and go back to business.
We had a long talk with ds, and suggested that he write a note of apology to the caregiver that he kicked and hit. He said he wouldn't do this anymore.
Then on Wednesday was the real kicker. At school, they had a fire drill. Ds took off running.
The teacher never called me, which shocks me. I double checked, no missed calls on my phones.
I found out about this at about 5:30, when I was on my way to a dinner meeting with my boss and co-workers. Dh told me that the teacher sent home a two page note, explaining what happened.
According to the note, the teacher and the aide had been working with him, preparing him for the drill. They thought he was fine with it. But I guess he started acting out of sorts, not wanting to go to art. They told him it wasn't safe to stay in the room with no one there, so they finally coaxed him to art class. Then the fire drill went off after that. He was first in line leaving the building. He walked silently and quickly to the designated area, AND THEN JUST KEPT GOING. Ack! He took off and hid. The staff apparently saw where he went, though he was already hiding when the teacher came out of the building. He wouldn't come back in with the rest of the class. His aide, teacher and principal were all out there trying to coax him back into the building. They never got him back to art class, though he did return to his regular classroom, and finished out the day.
The teacher just wanted us to be aware of what happened. She was very concerned, since leaving the class is not safe.
I heard this all as I pulled into the restaurant parking lot, for that dinner meeting. I went in and told my co-workers what happened. They are fully aware of all the goings on at school, especially since they often have to cover for me so I can go to the school and get my son. One of my friends looked at me and asked, "Where was his aide? Isn't that what she's there for? As a one-on-one assistant, to help keep this sort of thing from happening?"
You know, that's a very good question. Where was the aide? I know the art teacher was in the back of the room, while my son was in the front. Considering that autistic children are notorious for getting upset about transitions and change, one would think that the aide should be on the ball, prepared for a possible negative reaction. Not only that, but ds is extremely sensitive to sound, so an excruciatingly loud fire alarm would be tortuous to him.
When dh spoke to our son, he discovered that the kids were pushing ds, shoving him from behind, in an effort to speed him along. All the handling was very upsetting to him, especially when he was trying to cope with the noise, the change, and everything else. That's why he took off. Again, one has to ask, where was the aide?
Does it surprise me that ds took off? Not particularly. Elopement is a classic autistic move. He wouldn't have done that with us, but I would have kept an eagle eye out for him. I probably would have instructed him to put earplugs in, and I wouldn't have left him unsupervised in the line.
Now maybe I didn't get all the details. Just because the aide wasn't mentioned in the letter from the teacher doesn't mean she couldn't have been right there by his side. Maybe she was right with him when he bolted. I don't know. It doesn't say that, though.
But the incident concerns me, too. I worry how safe he is there, considering what he gets into when no one is watching him. He's gotten hurt twice so far this semester (three weeks). A cut on his shoulder and a badly skinned hand and knee. He's taken off running during a fire drill. Gotta wonder just how well supervised he is.
I'm also concerned that they could get fed up, and kick him out. Or a "change of placement." Not that I'd be adverse to sending him to a different school. I just want it to be a positive change, not a change for the worse. Or maybe they'll just throw him out and say we can't handle him. Homeschool him.
Personally, I think I'd do a terrific job of teaching him, to be quite honest with you. At least for a couple years or so. However, I can't afford to do this. I have to work. So does dh. The only autism doctor that he goes to now is not covered by insurance. We receive no assistance at all now. Not from the government, not from Easter Seals.
I have to bring home a paycheck. And I have to have insurance. I can't stay home and educate my son. And I can't cut my hours to stop using daycare.
And speaking of daycare: If he gets thrown out of that, where will we go now?
Oh yeah. On Thursday (the day after the fire drill), I received an email from the special ed teacher on the IEP team. She wants to call an "informal IEP meeting." Oh joy. Just what do you suppose that's going to be about?
I'm so unhappy. I don't know why ds is acting up. And I don't know what to suggest to them. I went to those first IEP meetings with such excitement and hope, believing that they would truly help my son. But it gets so frustrating when the supports they describe don't really happen. Or when they turn this into a discipline issue.
Ds has been telling me that they don't show him his smiley face chart. They're supposed to show this to him several times a day. He says they only bring it out when he's angry. The chart is supposed to help him to recognize his moods, and how he escalates, and what he can do to calm himself. What good is it, if they don't utilize it?
And he has a one-on-one aide. But if she isn't there when he's most certainly going to go through something upsetting, then what's the point? And if he takes off, when she's busy helping the teacher or another student, then she isn't really being a one-on-one aide.
And he has an OT, but she doesn't believe he has sensory issues, in spite of the fact that he's been diagnosed by numerous specialists as having severe sensory issues. (She says this because her therapies seem ineffectual with him.) I guess she forgets that the first time she brought him into her sensory room, he pretty much velcroed himself to her equipment. She had never seen a kid respond like that. And I guess she doesn't believe us when we tell her that he can't eat anything even remotely hot, and he can't sleep in daylight, and even the soft department store musac is enough to give him migraine headaches...and on and on... She, too, believes his problems to be discipline related.
His speech therapist has been wonderful with him. She's been a real saving grace in all this. Her social stories are helpful, her way of communicating with him is calming... I can't say anything but wonderful things about her.
My son is not a discipline problem at home. He's not wild, violent or lazy. He works hard, and happily. He loves to learn. He's very bright.
This shouldn't be this hard.
At daycare, we had two major problems. Ds was upset that he forgot something, so he just walked out of daycare. When the caregiver went after him, asking where he was going, ds yelled back, "Quit following me!" I hear he also tried to kick the caregiver when he tried to return him to the daycare. On another occasion, he was being hassled by another child, so he got upset, which ended up with him spitting (???) and hitting, followed by him running into the bathroom and holding the door closed so they couldn't get in. I'm wondering if I got the story right, because ds has never spit at anybody in his life. It may have been the other child, I don't know for sure. When they call me, it's so loud, and so much is going on, I don't always follow what is happening. And when the chaos clears, they just get off the phone and go back to business.
We had a long talk with ds, and suggested that he write a note of apology to the caregiver that he kicked and hit. He said he wouldn't do this anymore.
Then on Wednesday was the real kicker. At school, they had a fire drill. Ds took off running.
The teacher never called me, which shocks me. I double checked, no missed calls on my phones.
I found out about this at about 5:30, when I was on my way to a dinner meeting with my boss and co-workers. Dh told me that the teacher sent home a two page note, explaining what happened.
According to the note, the teacher and the aide had been working with him, preparing him for the drill. They thought he was fine with it. But I guess he started acting out of sorts, not wanting to go to art. They told him it wasn't safe to stay in the room with no one there, so they finally coaxed him to art class. Then the fire drill went off after that. He was first in line leaving the building. He walked silently and quickly to the designated area, AND THEN JUST KEPT GOING. Ack! He took off and hid. The staff apparently saw where he went, though he was already hiding when the teacher came out of the building. He wouldn't come back in with the rest of the class. His aide, teacher and principal were all out there trying to coax him back into the building. They never got him back to art class, though he did return to his regular classroom, and finished out the day.
The teacher just wanted us to be aware of what happened. She was very concerned, since leaving the class is not safe.
I heard this all as I pulled into the restaurant parking lot, for that dinner meeting. I went in and told my co-workers what happened. They are fully aware of all the goings on at school, especially since they often have to cover for me so I can go to the school and get my son. One of my friends looked at me and asked, "Where was his aide? Isn't that what she's there for? As a one-on-one assistant, to help keep this sort of thing from happening?"
You know, that's a very good question. Where was the aide? I know the art teacher was in the back of the room, while my son was in the front. Considering that autistic children are notorious for getting upset about transitions and change, one would think that the aide should be on the ball, prepared for a possible negative reaction. Not only that, but ds is extremely sensitive to sound, so an excruciatingly loud fire alarm would be tortuous to him.
When dh spoke to our son, he discovered that the kids were pushing ds, shoving him from behind, in an effort to speed him along. All the handling was very upsetting to him, especially when he was trying to cope with the noise, the change, and everything else. That's why he took off. Again, one has to ask, where was the aide?
Does it surprise me that ds took off? Not particularly. Elopement is a classic autistic move. He wouldn't have done that with us, but I would have kept an eagle eye out for him. I probably would have instructed him to put earplugs in, and I wouldn't have left him unsupervised in the line.
Now maybe I didn't get all the details. Just because the aide wasn't mentioned in the letter from the teacher doesn't mean she couldn't have been right there by his side. Maybe she was right with him when he bolted. I don't know. It doesn't say that, though.
But the incident concerns me, too. I worry how safe he is there, considering what he gets into when no one is watching him. He's gotten hurt twice so far this semester (three weeks). A cut on his shoulder and a badly skinned hand and knee. He's taken off running during a fire drill. Gotta wonder just how well supervised he is.
I'm also concerned that they could get fed up, and kick him out. Or a "change of placement." Not that I'd be adverse to sending him to a different school. I just want it to be a positive change, not a change for the worse. Or maybe they'll just throw him out and say we can't handle him. Homeschool him.
Personally, I think I'd do a terrific job of teaching him, to be quite honest with you. At least for a couple years or so. However, I can't afford to do this. I have to work. So does dh. The only autism doctor that he goes to now is not covered by insurance. We receive no assistance at all now. Not from the government, not from Easter Seals.
I have to bring home a paycheck. And I have to have insurance. I can't stay home and educate my son. And I can't cut my hours to stop using daycare.
And speaking of daycare: If he gets thrown out of that, where will we go now?
Oh yeah. On Thursday (the day after the fire drill), I received an email from the special ed teacher on the IEP team. She wants to call an "informal IEP meeting." Oh joy. Just what do you suppose that's going to be about?
I'm so unhappy. I don't know why ds is acting up. And I don't know what to suggest to them. I went to those first IEP meetings with such excitement and hope, believing that they would truly help my son. But it gets so frustrating when the supports they describe don't really happen. Or when they turn this into a discipline issue.
Ds has been telling me that they don't show him his smiley face chart. They're supposed to show this to him several times a day. He says they only bring it out when he's angry. The chart is supposed to help him to recognize his moods, and how he escalates, and what he can do to calm himself. What good is it, if they don't utilize it?
And he has a one-on-one aide. But if she isn't there when he's most certainly going to go through something upsetting, then what's the point? And if he takes off, when she's busy helping the teacher or another student, then she isn't really being a one-on-one aide.
And he has an OT, but she doesn't believe he has sensory issues, in spite of the fact that he's been diagnosed by numerous specialists as having severe sensory issues. (She says this because her therapies seem ineffectual with him.) I guess she forgets that the first time she brought him into her sensory room, he pretty much velcroed himself to her equipment. She had never seen a kid respond like that. And I guess she doesn't believe us when we tell her that he can't eat anything even remotely hot, and he can't sleep in daylight, and even the soft department store musac is enough to give him migraine headaches...and on and on... She, too, believes his problems to be discipline related.
His speech therapist has been wonderful with him. She's been a real saving grace in all this. Her social stories are helpful, her way of communicating with him is calming... I can't say anything but wonderful things about her.
My son is not a discipline problem at home. He's not wild, violent or lazy. He works hard, and happily. He loves to learn. He's very bright.
This shouldn't be this hard.
Friday, September 12, 2008
Thursday, September 11, 2008
Sunday, September 7, 2008
2nd Week
It's been an interesting week. Nathan got hurt at school, and then was sent home Tuesday.
I got a phone call that morning. It was Nathan. He told me he fell down and skinned his hands and knees. Sounds like the one hand was a lot worse than the rest. He was pretty upset about it, so they let him call me. I talked to him for a bit, and he calmed down. He just needed mom. :)
Later, he fell behind in class, and started to get frustrated and upset. They said he threw a small piece of cardboard on the floor, and crawled under a table. He did not hurt anybody. Sounds like it was a mini-melt, not a full blown meltdown.
They called Dh at work. I have no idea why they called him and not me. Dh was glad to leave work because it was ungodly hot, and there is no airconditioning where he works. But we were both a little perturbed that I wasn't called.
The school's explanation to Dh was that they didn't have my phone number. HUH?!? That's odd, considering they called me on my cell phone numerous times the previous week, AND called early Tuesday morning. But somehow my phone number is no longer on any records at the school. (Uh huh. Gimme a frickin' break. And all forms that have dh's number on them, also have mine, and mine is listed as the primary contact number.)
Do you know how many forms I had to fill out for that school, listing emergency numbers and who is allowed to pick him up, and all that? My number must be on file at least six different places there. Work, home and cell. Let alone the fact that they have had me on speed dial for the past four years. And come on! THEY CALLED ME THAT MORNING!
I was also irritated that they sent him home. For what? For crawling under a table? If they're going to send him home every time he does that, it's going to be a long semester.
Then Dh gets him home and Nathan starts right in on homework. He did homework for nearly three hours before I finally had to stop it. (He was getting really frustrated.) He hadn't been screwing around or dilly-dallying either. Hard work for three hours. That's a lot for him, and it had me really worried. I will not have him doing homework all night again, every night. When they've done that to him before, the meltdowns increased in number and in severity. That's just insane, to give that quantity of work to someone with autism.
I sent a note to the teacher, saying that he worked very hard, but he just couldn't do any more. It wasn't sent back home again the next day, and there was no response. I wonder what that means? Are they going to give him an F for the missing work? Or are they going to consider the homework assignment completed? I have no idea. Not much I can do about it. He just couldn't do any more. Oh, and I gave her my phone numbers, too.
The next couple days improved. He didn't have any more issues at school (that I know of). But Friday I received a call from the after-school caregivers. He got upset and went behind a door, and wouldn't come out. They considered this a safety issue, since there was stuff behind that door that he could get hurt on, if he messed around with it. I asked if I could talk to him, if he would take the phone.
I couldn't tell whether or not he had the phone. He wasn't talking. So I just kept rambling on about how I needed him to calm down, take deep breaths, and come on kiddo, talk to me. Finally I got a grunt. Progress. It didn't take long then, and I had him talking in one syllable answers. Then he got to short sentences. I talked him out from behind the door, and got him calmed down. He wouldn't tell me what happened. He couldn't communicate it. So I asked if some kid was giving him trouble. Yes. I told him to stick by the grown ups, and I would tell them that someone was giving him a hard time, and ask them to keep an eye out. Would that help? Yes. (Phew.) We talked a little longer and he gave the phone back to the caregiver.
She sounded relieved that I got him from behind the doors. (They divide the room in half, and there's a lot he can get into on the wrong side.) She knew what had happened with the other kid, and would keep an eye out for him. I told her she could call any time. But I also warned her that sometimes, if he's really upset and really angry, to be careful about giving him a phone because there is always the possibility that he could throw it. Hopefully, he won't get to that point.
The homework sent home during the rest of the week was minimal. That was good. Too much homework is definately a dangerous thing.
I did finally send the "Nathan Handbook" to the teacher. I hadn't finished going over it. The picture is still from last year, and it still had the note to the previous teacher in it. But I gave the new teacher a note and suggested that she read the first seven pages (about 15 minutes of reading), and hopefully this would give her some good info to help her right off the bat. Then I asked her to send the book back home with him this weekend, and I'd try to update it. I was thinking of adding a bit about perseveration, since that seems to be a real bone of contention with the school staff. Nathan tells me the teacher took the handbook home with her! Now that's more than his last teacher did. A very good sign. I hope the book helps.
And I almost forgot! Good news! He got another perfect score on his spelling test! I love seeing that. I just hope he doesn't expect that every time, because then he'll get upset when he doesn't get it. I try to tell him that it won't matter if he doesn't get 100%, that he tried very hard to do his best, and that's all we want, that the score doesn't matter. But I know how he gets with that perfectionism. I'll have to keep reminding him.
I've been taking him to the bus stop every morning in my car. I'd be thrilled to let him walk to the bus stop on his own, but I don't dare. There's still that one boy that beats up his sister on the stop, and when I'm not there, he goes after Nathan as well. So I don't give him the opportunity. His mother came with him and his sister on the first couple days. A lot of good that did. He went after his sister with his mother there, and the mom just got in between them, with the boy still swinging around her, trying to slug his sister. Good grief. This year, I'm keeping my camera in the car. Or my cell phone camera. If he's going to beat her up every morning again, I'll show the school exactly what's happening. I'm so tired of this. (On a good note, their house is up for sale!! YIPPEE!! I hope it sells soon.)
This has been a slightly rocky start to the new school year. Much better than last year at this time, though. But so far we've had two injuries (the shoulder cut and the skinned hands and knees), one melt in the classroom, one hide-behind-the-doors in afterschool care. The good things were that the new teacher seems very nice and kind, so that will be helpful for Nathan. And she actually made an effort to read the book, which is more than the previous teachers have done. So that's very good news. His bus driver is familiar with autism, and will be patient with him. And the bus stop bully may be moving - I'm keeping my fingers crossed. I guess at this point I'd say the first two weeks have been more good than bad. I hope the good will increase as Nathan gets used to the new routine, and knows what to expect. I sure hope so. And maybe, if they continue to resist restraining him, maybe he'll get to trust this staff. I sure hope so. I want to trust them, too.
I got a phone call that morning. It was Nathan. He told me he fell down and skinned his hands and knees. Sounds like the one hand was a lot worse than the rest. He was pretty upset about it, so they let him call me. I talked to him for a bit, and he calmed down. He just needed mom. :)
Later, he fell behind in class, and started to get frustrated and upset. They said he threw a small piece of cardboard on the floor, and crawled under a table. He did not hurt anybody. Sounds like it was a mini-melt, not a full blown meltdown.
They called Dh at work. I have no idea why they called him and not me. Dh was glad to leave work because it was ungodly hot, and there is no airconditioning where he works. But we were both a little perturbed that I wasn't called.
The school's explanation to Dh was that they didn't have my phone number. HUH?!? That's odd, considering they called me on my cell phone numerous times the previous week, AND called early Tuesday morning. But somehow my phone number is no longer on any records at the school. (Uh huh. Gimme a frickin' break. And all forms that have dh's number on them, also have mine, and mine is listed as the primary contact number.)
Do you know how many forms I had to fill out for that school, listing emergency numbers and who is allowed to pick him up, and all that? My number must be on file at least six different places there. Work, home and cell. Let alone the fact that they have had me on speed dial for the past four years. And come on! THEY CALLED ME THAT MORNING!
I was also irritated that they sent him home. For what? For crawling under a table? If they're going to send him home every time he does that, it's going to be a long semester.
Then Dh gets him home and Nathan starts right in on homework. He did homework for nearly three hours before I finally had to stop it. (He was getting really frustrated.) He hadn't been screwing around or dilly-dallying either. Hard work for three hours. That's a lot for him, and it had me really worried. I will not have him doing homework all night again, every night. When they've done that to him before, the meltdowns increased in number and in severity. That's just insane, to give that quantity of work to someone with autism.
I sent a note to the teacher, saying that he worked very hard, but he just couldn't do any more. It wasn't sent back home again the next day, and there was no response. I wonder what that means? Are they going to give him an F for the missing work? Or are they going to consider the homework assignment completed? I have no idea. Not much I can do about it. He just couldn't do any more. Oh, and I gave her my phone numbers, too.
The next couple days improved. He didn't have any more issues at school (that I know of). But Friday I received a call from the after-school caregivers. He got upset and went behind a door, and wouldn't come out. They considered this a safety issue, since there was stuff behind that door that he could get hurt on, if he messed around with it. I asked if I could talk to him, if he would take the phone.
I couldn't tell whether or not he had the phone. He wasn't talking. So I just kept rambling on about how I needed him to calm down, take deep breaths, and come on kiddo, talk to me. Finally I got a grunt. Progress. It didn't take long then, and I had him talking in one syllable answers. Then he got to short sentences. I talked him out from behind the door, and got him calmed down. He wouldn't tell me what happened. He couldn't communicate it. So I asked if some kid was giving him trouble. Yes. I told him to stick by the grown ups, and I would tell them that someone was giving him a hard time, and ask them to keep an eye out. Would that help? Yes. (Phew.) We talked a little longer and he gave the phone back to the caregiver.
She sounded relieved that I got him from behind the doors. (They divide the room in half, and there's a lot he can get into on the wrong side.) She knew what had happened with the other kid, and would keep an eye out for him. I told her she could call any time. But I also warned her that sometimes, if he's really upset and really angry, to be careful about giving him a phone because there is always the possibility that he could throw it. Hopefully, he won't get to that point.
The homework sent home during the rest of the week was minimal. That was good. Too much homework is definately a dangerous thing.
I did finally send the "Nathan Handbook" to the teacher. I hadn't finished going over it. The picture is still from last year, and it still had the note to the previous teacher in it. But I gave the new teacher a note and suggested that she read the first seven pages (about 15 minutes of reading), and hopefully this would give her some good info to help her right off the bat. Then I asked her to send the book back home with him this weekend, and I'd try to update it. I was thinking of adding a bit about perseveration, since that seems to be a real bone of contention with the school staff. Nathan tells me the teacher took the handbook home with her! Now that's more than his last teacher did. A very good sign. I hope the book helps.
And I almost forgot! Good news! He got another perfect score on his spelling test! I love seeing that. I just hope he doesn't expect that every time, because then he'll get upset when he doesn't get it. I try to tell him that it won't matter if he doesn't get 100%, that he tried very hard to do his best, and that's all we want, that the score doesn't matter. But I know how he gets with that perfectionism. I'll have to keep reminding him.
I've been taking him to the bus stop every morning in my car. I'd be thrilled to let him walk to the bus stop on his own, but I don't dare. There's still that one boy that beats up his sister on the stop, and when I'm not there, he goes after Nathan as well. So I don't give him the opportunity. His mother came with him and his sister on the first couple days. A lot of good that did. He went after his sister with his mother there, and the mom just got in between them, with the boy still swinging around her, trying to slug his sister. Good grief. This year, I'm keeping my camera in the car. Or my cell phone camera. If he's going to beat her up every morning again, I'll show the school exactly what's happening. I'm so tired of this. (On a good note, their house is up for sale!! YIPPEE!! I hope it sells soon.)
This has been a slightly rocky start to the new school year. Much better than last year at this time, though. But so far we've had two injuries (the shoulder cut and the skinned hands and knees), one melt in the classroom, one hide-behind-the-doors in afterschool care. The good things were that the new teacher seems very nice and kind, so that will be helpful for Nathan. And she actually made an effort to read the book, which is more than the previous teachers have done. So that's very good news. His bus driver is familiar with autism, and will be patient with him. And the bus stop bully may be moving - I'm keeping my fingers crossed. I guess at this point I'd say the first two weeks have been more good than bad. I hope the good will increase as Nathan gets used to the new routine, and knows what to expect. I sure hope so. And maybe, if they continue to resist restraining him, maybe he'll get to trust this staff. I sure hope so. I want to trust them, too.
Friday, September 5, 2008
Pingin'
Have you guys heard of Ping.fm?
This site is cool. It allows you to post to numerous blogs, with only a single post.
I post to a bunch of different social networks, in my attempts to raise autism awareness, and to reach out to others who know or love someone on the autism spectrum. Until now, there's been a lot of copying and pasting going on, as I post to one, and then copy in the rest. Some social networks did cross post, which helped. But I've always wished I could just post to one, and have the same message appear on all of my blogs. Nice and simple.
That's what Ping does.
They have a huge number of social networks they are able to work with, including blogs, micro blogs, IM's, etc. You have the ability to post to just your status, to just your micro blogs (tweets & plurks), or to just your blogs. You can post on your mobile, too.
Ping just came out of beta, and they've got lots of ideas for upgrades and tools to add in the future, so this site is still growing. Check it out at http://ping.fm
This site is cool. It allows you to post to numerous blogs, with only a single post.
I post to a bunch of different social networks, in my attempts to raise autism awareness, and to reach out to others who know or love someone on the autism spectrum. Until now, there's been a lot of copying and pasting going on, as I post to one, and then copy in the rest. Some social networks did cross post, which helped. But I've always wished I could just post to one, and have the same message appear on all of my blogs. Nice and simple.
That's what Ping does.
They have a huge number of social networks they are able to work with, including blogs, micro blogs, IM's, etc. You have the ability to post to just your status, to just your micro blogs (tweets & plurks), or to just your blogs. You can post on your mobile, too.
Ping just came out of beta, and they've got lots of ideas for upgrades and tools to add in the future, so this site is still growing. Check it out at http://ping.fm
One...The Only Way is One
Got another meme sent to me today. This was harder than I expected to do. You can only answer with One Word. Give it a try!
1. Where is your cell phone?...... purse
2. Where is your significant other?..... work
3. Your hair? ..... messy
4. Your mother?..... heaven
5. Your father?..... heaven
6. Your favorite thing?... pda
7. Your dream last night?..... sexy
8. Your dream/goal?..... website
9. The room you're in?..... living
10. Your fear?...... loss
11. Where do you want to be in 6 years...... happy
12. Where were you last night?.... home
13. What you're not?...... happy
14. Muffins?..... yum
15. One of your wish list items?... healthy
16. Where you grew up?....Chicago
17. Last thing you did?..... sleep
18. What are you wearing?.... sweats
19. Your TV?...... disconnected
20. Your pets?.... pooch
21. Your computer?...... overworked
22. Your life?...... chaotic
23. Your mood?..... anxious
24. Missing someone?...... hubby
25. Your car?....... fun
26. Something you're not wearing?... shoes
27. Favorite Store?...... Amazon
28. Your summer?..... peaceful
29. Love someone?..... yep
30. Your favorite color?..... pink
31.When is the last time you laughed?......yesterday
32. Last time you cried?..... Wednesday
33. Who will resend/reply to this?..... unsure
1. Where is your cell phone?...... purse
2. Where is your significant other?..... work
3. Your hair? ..... messy
4. Your mother?..... heaven
5. Your father?..... heaven
6. Your favorite thing?... pda
7. Your dream last night?..... sexy
8. Your dream/goal?..... website
9. The room you're in?..... living
10. Your fear?...... loss
11. Where do you want to be in 6 years...... happy
12. Where were you last night?.... home
13. What you're not?...... happy
14. Muffins?..... yum
15. One of your wish list items?... healthy
16. Where you grew up?....Chicago
17. Last thing you did?..... sleep
18. What are you wearing?.... sweats
19. Your TV?...... disconnected
20. Your pets?.... pooch
21. Your computer?...... overworked
22. Your life?...... chaotic
23. Your mood?..... anxious
24. Missing someone?...... hubby
25. Your car?....... fun
26. Something you're not wearing?... shoes
27. Favorite Store?...... Amazon
28. Your summer?..... peaceful
29. Love someone?..... yep
30. Your favorite color?..... pink
31.When is the last time you laughed?......yesterday
32. Last time you cried?..... Wednesday
33. Who will resend/reply to this?..... unsure
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