Physical

Thursday was not a good day.

Dh arrived at daycare to pick Nathan up, only to find him pinned to the floor, his arms crossed over his chest like some kind of straight jacket hold. He had been having a major meltdown. When they tried to release him, he would literally punch at the caregiver. Dh got him away from her, but then Nathan turned on him, punching at his hands where Dh was trying to hold him.

It all sprang from Nathan's frustration over not being able to do something. They had been playing a card game, and they asked Nathan to rubberband the deck of cards. He didn't know how to do that, to double the rubberband up on itself when the band was larger than the deck of cards. Rather than ask for help, or just say he didn't know how to do that, he just flipped out.

I ran out to Barnes & Noble, and Borders, looking for that book Can I Tell You About Asperger's Syndrome, but I couldn't find it. I sure hope he doesn't get thrown out of daycare again.

Not that I would blame them if they did. But I'm down to my last options here. I know the Park District has an afterschool care program, but it makes me nervous because Nathan was suspended the last time he had a meltdown when at a Park District daycamp. It's so hard for dh and I to not have a daycare we can depend upon. When they suspend him for a day or more, one of us has to take off work to be home with him. It really isn't punishment for Nathan, because 15 minutes past the event, he is done with it, and suspending him from the program doesn't really relate to the event. On top of it, he gets to be home, with mom or dad. That's like a reward for the event. And I keep waiting for the day when work pulls me aside and tells me they can't keep having me run out on them everytime my son throws a tantrum.

I took Nathan to the pediatrician on Wednesday. All he cared about was, "How is he doing in school?" Well, he's doing great academically, but it's these meltdowns that are the big issue. The doc said not to worry about it, as long as he's doing great in school. "Good job, Mom." Sigh. That's just useless to me. I asked about taking Nathan to a specialist. The pediatrician said I could, but he didn't think it was such a great idea. He said they have drugs for autism, but they are all experimental, and he shook his head as if to say 'you don't want to do that."

No, I don't want to do that. I don't even want him on the ADHD drug. I don't want him on any meds. I just want him to learn some tools to help him cope with his frustration levels. Perhaps it is too soon for all the therapy to make much of a difference. Or maybe the therapy doesn't really affect that. I don't know. I just wish I knew how to help my son. I want him to not have to experience being pinned to the floor or having his arms held across his chest like a straightjacket. I want him to feel confidence in his own ability to control himself.

Where do I go to find help?