Tuesday, March 31, 2009
Monday, March 30, 2009
Linking
Oh my. I just came from the "Linking Meeting," where the process begins to link DS from the school he is leaving to the school he will be attending next year. I'm overwhelmed. I can only imagine how that little guy feels.
The school is HUGE. I was surprised at how big it is. And when we walked in, we entered next to the boys locker room, where these gigantic kids (who resembled high schoolers more than middle schoolers) towered over me, and were noisy and full of commotion. Just as kids should be. But not how my little aspie is. DS just froze. I slid an arm around him and just scooped him right though the doors and on his way down the hallway, and he was fine. I was thinking holy Toledo, those kids are enormous. And loud. And how the hell is he going to cope with that??? But then again, I'm on high over-protection mode. Once DS got past the surprise of the big loud kids, he seemed fine. Mom on the other hand is shaking in her boots.
The meeting was up a ton of stairs, and my knees were killing me by the end. Let's hope I don't have to spend much time here.
The meeting went very well, for the most part. The people seemed very kind, very eager to help, and full of information. I was on info overload very quickly. DS was on every kind of overload, but he did reasonably well. Just very fidgety and nervous, and then went into a form of mild shut down, where he laid his head on the desk. It was okay, we didn't need him to be completely participating. And DH took him for a walk which helped tremendously. DS spoke for himself most of the time. I was asked how to avoid melts and how to de-escalate a melt (um, don't touch him...!), but they made it clear they had been completely and thoroughly filled in by the old school. Dang. Well, no surprise there. I knew that was coming. I was just having some wishful thinking that they could get to know the little squirt before they passed judgment on him, but that wasn't very realistic.
I was disheartened that they brought up the police in the very first meeting, and right in front of my son. Not a good sign. Not entirely unexpected, but I thought this would come later, not during the first hour. Sheesh. But I suppose it had to come up at some point.
But all in all, DH and I were very pleased with the meeting, and got a good vibe from everyone at the new school. I met one of DS's future teachers, and I really got a kick out of him! YOUNG. Holy cow, was he young. But he was quirky and funny and looked like a PERFECT teacher for my son, if first impressions are any indication. (Mine are not always on target.) I liked him right off the bat. This would be the math teacher. Even better, because DS loves math.
There was talk of a peer taking DS under his wing, and a student giving him a tour sometime very soon. And lots of kids that will be protective of him.
OH! And the teachers are talking of...WILLINGLY...VOLUNTARILY...taking a seminar on autism!!! Woohoo!! That could only help. There is one other autie there. I have no idea what they're like, or if they are high functioning or not. It will be interesting to find out. Wouldn't it be cool if someone actually had a bit of understanding about autism here? One can hope, right?
Overall, DH and I got the impression that this group was much more willing to work with us and help us. And they seemed very upbeat around DS (except for that one police bit, but that was brief, and kind of went over his head). DS is excited to hear there is a swimming pool. (Yikes, must teach him to swim NOW.) I hadn't expected that. Not in middle school.
Sigh. I'm a wreck. A complete nervous wreck. Nothing really went wrong, and the vast majority seemed to go right. But I've been warned over and over about middle school being rough on spectrum kids. And my mama bear instincts are on kicking up a notch...or ten.
DH thinks all will be fine. He'll do fine. The group seems helpful and friendly, and talk about being proactive, and preventing melts. All good.
The old school has left these scars on my optimism, however. And I struggle with all of this.
But it will be a new year, a new building, a new staff, and a whole new beginning. Right? Every reason to expect the best outcome, right? And DS has come SO far, in being more independent, in being more outgoing and social, in being more responsible. All good, right?
I'll keep my fingers crossed. And I'll keep trying to shove all this fear down, and just wait and see what happens.
Oh yeah. When we got back from the meeting, I got a letter from the (current, old) school. It said that DS has had four instances at the school, and if he has five, he will not be permitted to attend the school field trip. It's a camping trip, away for the weekend. Crap.
Interesting to note, we were not given formal write ups about these instances. And two of them were on the same day, and were actually from the same meltdown! Not very fair if you ask me.
We knew this was coming. They told us on the first day of school that they weren't going to be able to deal with his autism on this trip. And I knew right then and there that they would make absolutely sure he couldn't attend. Also, they have made no attempts to include him, no attempts to make arrangements. But they sure as hell made sure he did his part in the fundraising efforts BEFORE they sent that letter to me, informing me that he wouldn't be permitted to go if there is just one more incident.
Charming. And really emphasized the contrast between how the new school is trying to work with us, but how the old school isn't. I'm so glad to be leaving that place. I hope I never have to set foot on those school grounds again, or see those teachers again. A few of the therapists and such were very good, and I liked them. The Speech Therapist, for one. She was a gem. A real saving grace. I thought the world of her. I'll miss her. And the Social Worker. A few others, too. But there are some that bring up such contempt and pain in me. How can they treat a little boy that way? There are staff member that I truly wonder about, if they even have a conscience?
So out of one school and on to the next. Will it be more of the same? Or will we finally find someone who wants to help a little boy discover the joy of learning, while helping him get past his challenges? I know it can be done. I know it can be done easily. I know because I've done it myself. Now will they embrace that? Or will they try to fit him into the neurotypical box that he won't fit into?
The school is HUGE. I was surprised at how big it is. And when we walked in, we entered next to the boys locker room, where these gigantic kids (who resembled high schoolers more than middle schoolers) towered over me, and were noisy and full of commotion. Just as kids should be. But not how my little aspie is. DS just froze. I slid an arm around him and just scooped him right though the doors and on his way down the hallway, and he was fine. I was thinking holy Toledo, those kids are enormous. And loud. And how the hell is he going to cope with that??? But then again, I'm on high over-protection mode. Once DS got past the surprise of the big loud kids, he seemed fine. Mom on the other hand is shaking in her boots.
The meeting was up a ton of stairs, and my knees were killing me by the end. Let's hope I don't have to spend much time here.
The meeting went very well, for the most part. The people seemed very kind, very eager to help, and full of information. I was on info overload very quickly. DS was on every kind of overload, but he did reasonably well. Just very fidgety and nervous, and then went into a form of mild shut down, where he laid his head on the desk. It was okay, we didn't need him to be completely participating. And DH took him for a walk which helped tremendously. DS spoke for himself most of the time. I was asked how to avoid melts and how to de-escalate a melt (um, don't touch him...!), but they made it clear they had been completely and thoroughly filled in by the old school. Dang. Well, no surprise there. I knew that was coming. I was just having some wishful thinking that they could get to know the little squirt before they passed judgment on him, but that wasn't very realistic.
I was disheartened that they brought up the police in the very first meeting, and right in front of my son. Not a good sign. Not entirely unexpected, but I thought this would come later, not during the first hour. Sheesh. But I suppose it had to come up at some point.
But all in all, DH and I were very pleased with the meeting, and got a good vibe from everyone at the new school. I met one of DS's future teachers, and I really got a kick out of him! YOUNG. Holy cow, was he young. But he was quirky and funny and looked like a PERFECT teacher for my son, if first impressions are any indication. (Mine are not always on target.) I liked him right off the bat. This would be the math teacher. Even better, because DS loves math.
There was talk of a peer taking DS under his wing, and a student giving him a tour sometime very soon. And lots of kids that will be protective of him.
OH! And the teachers are talking of...WILLINGLY...VOLUNTARILY...taking a seminar on autism!!! Woohoo!! That could only help. There is one other autie there. I have no idea what they're like, or if they are high functioning or not. It will be interesting to find out. Wouldn't it be cool if someone actually had a bit of understanding about autism here? One can hope, right?
Overall, DH and I got the impression that this group was much more willing to work with us and help us. And they seemed very upbeat around DS (except for that one police bit, but that was brief, and kind of went over his head). DS is excited to hear there is a swimming pool. (Yikes, must teach him to swim NOW.) I hadn't expected that. Not in middle school.
Sigh. I'm a wreck. A complete nervous wreck. Nothing really went wrong, and the vast majority seemed to go right. But I've been warned over and over about middle school being rough on spectrum kids. And my mama bear instincts are on kicking up a notch...or ten.
DH thinks all will be fine. He'll do fine. The group seems helpful and friendly, and talk about being proactive, and preventing melts. All good.
The old school has left these scars on my optimism, however. And I struggle with all of this.
But it will be a new year, a new building, a new staff, and a whole new beginning. Right? Every reason to expect the best outcome, right? And DS has come SO far, in being more independent, in being more outgoing and social, in being more responsible. All good, right?
I'll keep my fingers crossed. And I'll keep trying to shove all this fear down, and just wait and see what happens.
Oh yeah. When we got back from the meeting, I got a letter from the (current, old) school. It said that DS has had four instances at the school, and if he has five, he will not be permitted to attend the school field trip. It's a camping trip, away for the weekend. Crap.
Interesting to note, we were not given formal write ups about these instances. And two of them were on the same day, and were actually from the same meltdown! Not very fair if you ask me.
We knew this was coming. They told us on the first day of school that they weren't going to be able to deal with his autism on this trip. And I knew right then and there that they would make absolutely sure he couldn't attend. Also, they have made no attempts to include him, no attempts to make arrangements. But they sure as hell made sure he did his part in the fundraising efforts BEFORE they sent that letter to me, informing me that he wouldn't be permitted to go if there is just one more incident.
Charming. And really emphasized the contrast between how the new school is trying to work with us, but how the old school isn't. I'm so glad to be leaving that place. I hope I never have to set foot on those school grounds again, or see those teachers again. A few of the therapists and such were very good, and I liked them. The Speech Therapist, for one. She was a gem. A real saving grace. I thought the world of her. I'll miss her. And the Social Worker. A few others, too. But there are some that bring up such contempt and pain in me. How can they treat a little boy that way? There are staff member that I truly wonder about, if they even have a conscience?
So out of one school and on to the next. Will it be more of the same? Or will we finally find someone who wants to help a little boy discover the joy of learning, while helping him get past his challenges? I know it can be done. I know it can be done easily. I know because I've done it myself. Now will they embrace that? Or will they try to fit him into the neurotypical box that he won't fit into?
Sunday, March 22, 2009
Friday, March 20, 2009
Tuesday, March 17, 2009
Sunday, March 15, 2009
Monday, March 9, 2009
Monday, March 2, 2009
Subscribe to:
Comments (Atom)